Annie's Mailbox Parts II and III

Where do they get these people from? A little bit of sense about themselves would go a long way. Maybe they just need Jesus.

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DEAR ANNIE: I am 28 years old and read your column daily. The problem is my boyfriend, "Dave." He went overboard last month and hit me in front of our two young children. Of course, he was arrested, and a restraining order was issued. We both know what he did was wrong, and he apologized to me and the kids.
The problem is, no one seems to understand that I love this man. We've been together for 10 years. Dave agrees that he needs counseling but won't go unless I go, too. My family is furious, but they don't know him like I do.
Annie, can this relationship be saved? -- The Lost One

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DEAR ANNIE: I am a 47-year-old woman, married almost 30 years, and I have two grown sons. For the past 10 years, I have been having an affair with my 27-year-old nephew, "Steven."
It began shortly after the death of my father. In the beginning, it was a matter of seeing similarities between my father and nephew, and I was drawn to that. Now, I realize that I am in love with Steven. I also have been sending money regularly to Steven because he's had some legal problems, and I am hoping it will help him straighten out his life. My husband has no idea this has been going on.
I care deeply for my husband, but I am in love with my nephew and dream of running away with him. I have tried counseling, but it just doesn't seem to be working. I guess that's because part of me doesn't want things to change.
I don't want to give up what I have with Steven, but if I tell my husband, he'll divorce me, and I don't want that, either. Please, please help. -- Aunt in Agony

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Questions/Comments? How would you respond to the above writers?